May Robot Jesus Be With You.

I used to understand technology.  It used to work properly.  It used to be easier.

Last night, my brand-fucking-new phone stopped charging.  I plugged the charger into the phone and put its other end into the wall. Doing this animated the power bar in the top righthand corner, indicating the phone is charging.  However, after 15 minutes, my battery-life percentage dropped from 15% to 10%.  I tried a different outlet, I tried plugging it into my car charger, and I prayed,  all to no avail.  It was useless.  My phone could not be resuscitated.  It had resigned itself to death like Baron Munchausen in his movie.  Incidentally – if you haven’t seen “The Adventures of Baron Munchausen” you’re doing yourself a disservice.  Easily one of my favorite movies and one of the best designed. If you don’t believe me, it was nominated for 4 Oscars.  Anyway, like the Baron, my phone was quite happy flitting away its remaining hours of life playing cards inside the belly of the Whale of futility and Hopelessness. Later that night,  it died in my hands. - I’d like to think I helped make its passing easier.

When I got home, I plugged it into the wall and without hesitation it sprung back to life.  Right now it’s nestled in my pocket willing and ready as I am.  In other words, Jesus is an Android.